To laugh or not to laugh?

Let's watch a movie. Bring it on something good, language, violence, sex, comedy. Add mom and Dad and I thing I'd rather watch the teletubbies. And damn I really wanted to watch that movie. So what are my options? Do I laugh?

What swear words am I aloud to laugh at?

What about sex? Can I watch it or do I have to pretend to be their little princess?

In general how can I watch this movie with my parents and not be so awkwarded out? I can't there is no hope. If I leave then it's awkward if I don't  it's awkward. But I have some tips, ideas that are not proven, tested, or mildly experimented on but they are the best you've got.

Can't take the awkwardness?

If you must leave I suggest one of the following

1. Have a friend call you or if you have no friends there should be a setting on your phone that test calls your phone or whatever. Pretend you are talking on the phone and make your escape. 
2. Type furiously on your phone while scrunching your eyebrows multiple times, tipping your head from side to side but not to fast this isn't a 80's disco move. This will give the illusion of friend problem that require immediate attention that means you can make your escape. 
3. Look out the window, make huge eyes, stammer about a giant purple elephant and run out of the room.   

I want to stick it out!

You can do it! Here are 3 steps to help you be a man or woman or whatever gender you want to associate with. 

1. Only chuckle never full on laugh even if there really is a giant purple elephant.
2. Have an "ah oh" option that way when you're not sure what to do laugh, cry, or stare at your dog for a few minutes you can use your "ah oh" option. I suggest a computer, phone, magazine, grand piano with a Chopin score but any or all will do. 
3. Think lamaze classes. In and out keep breathing try to relax, even slow breathing. It's the only way to stop grabbing for your paper bag.

Good luck and may the movies be with you.